Bragging on the wonderous works of my God

Posts tagged ‘fear’

Fear of Pain?

I was watching Beth Moore today on Life Today.  I usually catch up on her Wednesday show via iTunes.  It’s about a 20 minute segment and I really enjoy it.

She brought up a subject that made a light bulb go off in my head.  How many times has the Lord compelled you to be healed but you won’t take the step of faith because you are afraid of the pain of the process?  That is the biggest lie of the devil.   If we are already in pain, what is there to be afraid of?  God only has our best interest at heart.

I remember for about a year, I wanted to lose weight so badly. I talked to God about it constantly. And I do mean constantly.  Every time I went to get a shower and looked in the mirror, I started dialoguing about how much I would love to be smaller.  Every time I moved, I wanted to be smaller. Everybody I watched on TV made me want to be smaller.  Shopping for clothes was non-existent because it reminded me of how much I wanted to be smaller.  Stuffing my face with junk food just caused more pain because the whole time I ate, I hated myself.

Oh sure, I was 286 lbs and I needed to be smaller.  I begged God for help. I whined about all of the things I could not physically do nor could I afford to do them. This went on for a year.  I can’t tell you the last time I was under 200 lbs, come to think of it.  But I’m sure God was getting His fill of my excuses and whining and fears.

He got my attention to nudge me in the direction of doing what I needed to be doing all along.  In August of last year, I had an acutely inflamed sciatic nerve that just about did me in. I was in pain, a lot of pain.  Every movement was excruciating.  YET, in my mind, I was SCARED of going through the healing process. Sounds ridiculous now that it is in black and white. Well, truthfully, it was ridiculous.

Once the healing began, I have never felt better in my life.  I have my full brain function back. Seriously.  I was having swiss-cheese brain farts and I just figured it was because I was getting older (I’m only 46) but, hey, any excuse’ll do…right?   I am not constantly thinking about my weight.  I can focus where I truly should be focusing…on Christ.

Yesterday marked the first week of being totally free of anti-depressants since 2000.  I prayed about that, too.  Fear of the process?  Yes, I was scared. I admitted that outright to the Lord and asked for His help daily.  Totally different from when I was running from the pain of getting healthy. This was something I truly wanted to be free from.

God can do amazing things if we let Him.  He’s not the kind of God to force His will upon us. He has given us free will.  He lovingly and patiently waits until we take the first step of faith. He will then move mountains to help us.

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Fear

Fear can be a powerful motivator.  All of us have fears, whether rational or not.  I used to be deathly afraid of spiders until one day I decided to “get over it.”  I watched Arachnophobia and began researching to learn about these fascinating things that God created. Eventually, I got over it.

The Bible teaches us not to fear.  Jesus Himself said to “fear not.” 

Joshua 1:9 –  “Have not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage ; be not afraid , neither be thou dismayed : for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest .” (KJV)

2 Timothy 1:7 –  “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” (KJV)

Fear and insecurity seem to go hand-in-hand.  At least with me, they do.  I wrote this post today to remind myself that God is in control and I shouldn’t fear anything.

But I am unsettled at the moment. 

Hallmark Man has a colonoscopy scheduled next week. 

This weekend, we are going out of town (which, oddly enough, I hate).  I am a homebody through and through and I like to sleep in my own bed.  We are going to visit family but that still doesn’t assuage my uneasiness.

I don’t want to leave my dog–even overnight. I can’t take her because she is a neurotic mess away from home.  I am wondering how she is going to do visiting at my son’s house while we are gone.

I like the comforts of MY home. My bed. Quiet, blessed serenity.

I’ve also been reading too much about government and Big Pharma control and I need a break. Mentally, I need to step back and remember that God is in control. 

He will never let anything happen to us that doesn’t have a greater purpose.  He has to give permission and consent for anything to happen to us. He will never leave us nor forsake us.

There. I feel better.  Sometimes I just have to remind myself Who is in charge and it’s not me or the government (although they like to think they are). 

God is sovereign and I trust Him alone.

 

Waiting…

I love the way the Lord speaks to me through nature.  He doesn’t audibly speak, but His message is loud and clear.  He loves me and He loves YOU.  I can have a bad day or feel down and I can go outside and He has created something beautiful and I see it for the first time and it just makes me smile every time. 

I’ll never forget the time I was mowing and I was down in a pit mentally and emotionally and could not see daylight.  I got near the fenceline and there was this neon tropical orange flower blooming.  I didn’t plant it. Somehow a seed made its way over there and grew.  I knew it was not wild purslane because that had little tiny pink flowers and they were everywhere in my yard.  This was portulaca and it was gorgeous.  My heart soared and I smiled.  Simple things like that give me joy because my Heavenly Father created them and He does an awesome job!

Look around you. The beauty of the sky. The graceful flutter of a butterfly.  All creation sings His glory.  Have you ever studied the details of a spider?  or the beautiful detail of a cat’s markings?  My Father has an awesome imagination!

My kids call me a “tree hugger” because I enjoy nature so much. What they don’t see or understand is that nature puts me in awe of the Creator Himself. I can’t wait to meet Him!

I spend countless hours in the yard, watching nature and talking to the Father.   It’s something that I do to remind myself that He is still in control and life goes on no matter what is happening in our lives.  When you are waiting on an answer from Him, what do you do?

I don’t know where He’s leading me but I do know that each day is a fresh start.  Spend time in the Word and in prayer to align your heart with His and you are off to a great start.  You will need every bit of help you can get from Him as the day progresses.  Sometimes things get tough and He can guide you through it.  We are only promised today. That is all we can count on.  Today is a gift. 

There is a popular song that asks us, “if today were your last day…”  how would you use it?  Would you spend time with family and friends?  Are you making regrets?  My dad used to tell me never do anything you’ll regret.  Live wisely. 

How can you make the most of your time while you are waiting on the Lord? 

Start each day with Him. Ask His direction in each aspect of your day. Are you doing something He would be pleased with?  How are your responses to others?  Are they short and snappy or thoughtful and considerate?

One thing that always amazes me is how Jesus treated others when He was on this earth.  Even knowing how brutally He would be tortured and then die for us, He still cared for others.  On the cross,  He made sure that His mother was taken care of when He told John, “Behold your mother.”  The thief on the cross next to Him believed and Jesus told him, “Today you will be with Me in paradise.”  

I don’t know about you, but if I have something coming up that I know is going to be painful and I’m dreading it, I am not very pleasant to be around.  I am too consumed with worry and dread. 

Waiting, worrying and wondering can cause us to be  so preoccupied that we miss the small things and the daily gifts that God sends our way to remind us that He is sovereign and in control and nothing happens without His knowledge or consent. 

Take your life one day at the time and while you’re waiting on the Lord, do what you know you should do.  Do your best and leave the results up to God.  When the time is right, you’ll have your answer but only when the time is right.  It’s not our timing but God’s providence.  His timing is always perfect.  When He’s completed a good work in you, you will be able to look back and see His hand on your life.  He may have been protecting you from something or preparing something for you.  You may need extra training before you are ready for what He has for you. 

Think about Moses and David.  Moses spent 40 years in the wilderness being “untrained” as an Egyptian Prince before he was ready to be used of God.  David spent 14 years running from King Saul before he was ready to be king.  During those times, he was heavy hearted.  Read some of his Psalms and you’ll see where he poured his heart out to God.  The Bible doesn’t share what was going through every patriarch’s mind but we did get to see the heart of David, whom was said of God, “He is a man after My own heart.”  David was honest with God.  He didn’t try to be brave when he was hurting.  God knows how we really feel and He wants a relationship with us.  How can you have a relationship when you are not completely honest? 

The time that David spent running from Saul, prepared him for warfare.  He became an expert warrior, which helped him when he finally became Israel’s king. 

What does God have planned for you or me? Only He knows.  We just have to take it one day at the time.  When you are down, look to what the Creator created.

Every morning and evening, the Canadian Geese fly past my house coming and going to their daily activities.  I love to watch them fly in the “V” formation and they chatter as they go past.  They reside at the pond near the back of our neighborhood.  In the morning, they fly out to look for food and then come back at dusk.  It just fascinates me how God created such amazing birds.  It doesn’t take much to excite me when it comes to our Heavenly Father.  He is my hope and joy in this dismal world. 

Stay focused on Him and be blessed in the Lord!

 

Be blessed in the Lord!

Transparency

How “real” are you?  Are you fake in public and let your hair down at home?  If so, why?  Are you scared to let others in?

I’ve posed a lot of questions today but I wanted you to start thinking.  If you are afraid to be who you are in public, then you need some healing from God.  He knows who you are inside and out, every thought, every breath.  Nothing is kept secret from Him.  Fear is False Evidence Appearing Real.  This fear that you have of opening up to others and sharing yourself could be shame, low self-esteem or just plain pride.  Jesus took away your shame, if you have accepted Him as Lord and Savior of your life.  If you are depending on anyone other than God for your self-esteem, you are going to be disappointed.  And finally, pride is a sin.  Confess it, get over it and move on.

Let’s camp on shame for a moment.  I’ve done a multitude of things in my lifetime that have shamed me and my God. But you know what?  I’ve taken them to Him, confessed and repented and He said he would forgive me and I believe that.  I can walk into church with my head held high because my Heavenly Father loves me.  I don’t care what someone else thinks about me.  The only one that matters is God.  He is the one that I am going to have to answer to for my actions and thoughts.  The people on this planet judge from the exterior.  They don’t know your heart, but the Father does.  He judges motive. 

I can’t tell you how freeing it is to walk into a room of strangers and NOT CARE what they think about me!  I used to be so ashamed of my looks, my past and that I was not a “success” in the world’s eyes.  It was crippling. 

Now, I’m not going to say that it doesn’t sting when you get “slapped” by someone because they misjudged your motive.  I’m not saying that at all.  We are still human, after all, and our feelings get hurt.  It’s normal.  But, there is a HUGE difference when you can take it to the Lord and let Him handle it.  It’s freedom to live as He intended us to live.  He did not intend for us to carry around guilt and shame.  He wants us to live in peace and joy.  He is the only One who can give that to us in the midst of turmoil.  Happiness is completely circumstantial and someone can say something unkind and you can lose your happiness.  Joy is from God.  I find that when I am in the midst of turmoil, I still have that inner peace.  I know it is from Him.  It gives me unspeakable joy and I sing.  Singing lifts my heart  and the enemy is forced to listen and then they know they have not won. 

We have a multitude of witnesses upon our lives in the spiritual realm.  I keep that in mind at all times and I have always had a tendency to talk to “myself.”  But deep down, I know that I am not talking to myself.  The Lord hears me and the angels in my midst are also listening and watching. 

Do you realize the grace that has been given us?  GRACE is God’s Riches at Christ’s Expense.  Think deeply on this one.  The laws of nature were created by God. They do not change. The sun doesn’t randomly decide it wants to go to another galaxy.  The trees don’t decide they want to sit down and pout for a while because they stand too much.  The angels, demons, all of creation and even Satan himself has to obey God.  We are the only ones with a choice; a free will.  I am curious why He allows us to do what we want, with consequence of course. Some things are just so deep that I ponder them often.  That is one that I guess I won’t completely understand until I get to Heaven and meet my Savior.  I am certainly looking forward to that day and I hope you are, too!

Be blessed in the Lord!

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